Seriously, it feels like Narnia here - well, the Narnia at the beginning of The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe, because winter's grip has not lessened despite the time "springing forward" and the "official" start of Spring withe the vernal equinox. I know, I know, I live in the mountains and it's March. But seriously, how far can that excuse really go? It's the 25th of March and we woke up to two inches of sticky, wet snow this morning. It melted off during the day, then it began again a couple of hours ago, and everything is covered again. I love snow...but holy moly, there needs to be an end to everything, right?
Since I'm on the Narnia train of thought...what would I do if I stepped into Narnia and met Aslan? I think I'd be undeniably drawn to him, but I would also be scared...or maybe ashamed? I'm not sure how to label that "negative" feeling, but I feel like I would need to apologize - what for, I'm not sure. So, while I can exult in the idea that "Aslan is on the move," I'm just not sure I want him moving too close to me. Maybe it's because I feel like I have so many unanswered questions and doubts, there so much I just want to KNOW, and I feel so weak in "just having faith" instead. Maybe it's because I don't feel like I pray enough or read my Bible enough. Maybe it's because I'm still cynical about church (not God, not Jesus, not my faith - church) and I'm often reluctant to try to go. Maybe it's because I judge myself much more harshly than anyone else ever could, and I only see the places where I DON'T measure up to whatever imagined standards I've imposed upon myself. I realize those standards aren't Aslan's - but I'm sorry about not meeting them anyway.
In other news (and somewhat related to my thoughts on this), you really should read my friend Koryn's blog. Even if you're not into horses, there's good stuff there, and she has such solid ways of thinking through even her silliest ideas. And, the picture she posted today of her riding Bimini is pretty darn awesome.
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